[Warning: The following chapter contains content that maybe triggering to some]
No. This can’t be happening to me. I can’t be pregnant. Not now and definitely not with Ethan’s baby.
“Why God?” I whisper as the tears fall down my face.
I wait for an answer but none comes. He doesn’t tell me why this was happening to me. He doesn’t tell
me why he had to make me this unlucky.
I try to pick myself from the bathroom floor, but I just don’t have the energy. I’m completely drained.
Was it my lot in life to have unplanned pregnancies? First with Noah and now this one.
I stare sightlessly at the tiled floor, thinking back. Ethan and I had unprotected sex once. I was supposed
to take a morning after pill, but I completely forgot. By the time I remembered, a few days had already
I told Ethan about it. I expected him to be angry about it, but he wasn’t. Instead he calmed me down. We
both reasoned that it was unlikely for me to be pregnant.
I noticed some changes, like my period being late, but I thought it was due to the stress I was under. I
never gave much thought to my increase in appetite since I always eat when I’m stressed or sad.
The banging on my door startles me, but I don’t get up. Now more than before, I didn’t want to see
anybody. When the banging continues, I put my head between my knees and cover my ears. I just wanted
whoever it is to leave.
It becomes silent for a while. I breathe a sigh of relief but then start to panic when I hear the door open.
and heavy footsteps walking upstairs.
Before I can do anything, like maybe hide, in case it was an intruder. A shadow fills the door way to my
“Ava?” Rowan’s deep voices resonates through the entire room.
The moment my eyes meet with his, I start crying again. Of all people, why did it have to be him?
“What are you doing here?” I ask through my sobs.
He comes and kneels before me, his eyes staring at me with an emotion I can’t figure out.
“Emma told me she saw you at the store. She said you looked hysterical and that you bought a bunch of
pregnancy tests before leaving” he tells me softly, his fingers wiping away my tears.
Damn it Emma and her big mouth! What the hell did she think she’ll accomplish by telling Rowan that I bought pregnancy tests?
“She shouldn’t have told you. It’s none of her business neither is it yours” I hiss.
He doesn’t react instead he asks. “Have you taken the test?”
I just nod my head as more tears fill my eyes.
I don’t answer him. I just couldn’t bring myself to admit what the test informed me.
When I don’t answer he surveys the room. His eyes land on them laying near the sink. He stands up and goes to check them. I should be fucking angry that he was violating my privacy, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. Not when I had much more important things to worry about.
He comes back and this time instead of kneeling before me. He instead sits next to me.
“Congratulation. You’re going to be a great mother” he tell me an odd catch in his voice.
I lay my head on his shoulder as I speak. “Am I? You didn’t ever want to have another baby with me even though I wanted one desperately. I thought it’s because you thought I was a bad mother”
I was always so insecure when it came to Rowan. I knew the real reason. He didn’t want another baby because he was holding out hope that Emma will come back. I lied to myself because it was better to think he thought I wasn’t a good mother than to acknowledge that he just didn’t want a baby with me.
“I’ve never thought you’re a bad mother, Ava. You’re the fucking best. One just has to look at the relationship between you and Noah to know it’s true” he pauses. “Can I tell you something?”